Con Heiress

Stewie sees Brian's picture in a society photograph in the paper and learns that he's been dating the rich older women. When he later also sees Brian sporting an expensive but out-of-style watch fob, he decides to get in on the action himself and they agree to try not to sabotage each other. But when they both set their sights on the most moneyed woman in town while at the Newport Yacht Club, they start to hover around in case her elderly husband should pass.

However, they find the husband is really Quagmire who is also waiting for her to die. Tired of catering to her, Quagmire agrees to a split if they can hasten her death but suggests they butt out if they can't handle it. When the news reports that she died suddenly of a heart attack, Quagmire warily credits them for carrying out the deed and hands over their half to her estate. During probate, they find she was millions of dollars in debt that they are now responsible for. Despite this, they celebrate still being alive as it is revealed that the heiress has faked her death to escape her debt and that she is really Meg in disguise, who celebrates the fact that it was another one of her episodes.

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Meanwhile, Lois insists on Peter mowing the lawn and he agrees to teach Chris how to do it. But when Herbert sees him from the rear in his shorts, he believes him to be another teenager and offers Chris $600 to bring over his 'friend' to mow his lawn. Even when he meets him in person, he doesn't recognize Peter as an adult. Herbert soon begins focusing his attentions on him and Chris begins to feel ignored. He finally has enough of Peter goofing off while he works and they start to fight in front of Herbert, tearing their clothes off in the process. But when Chris calls him "dad," he realizes he's made a huge error and explodes. However, Herbert's dog Jesse gathers up a shred of him and plants it, allowing him to regrow in the manner of Groot from Guardian's of the Galaxy.