The Lois Quagmire

When Lois gets an invitation to her fancy high school reunion, she realizes that taking Peter is probably not a good idea. When she bumps into Quagmire at a coffee shop and sees him in his spiffy pilot's uniform, she invites him to come along and pose as her husband. However, they end up in the honeymoon suite at their hotel and find they're stuck with the room. Quagmire is a success, but when the evening is over, Lois prepares to turn down his good night kiss. However, he is already made arrangements to meet with a cocktail waitress and leaves her at her door. When he returns the next morning, Lois feels left out and it continues through breakfast with her former classmates. She finally confronts him over the lack of attention, and he admits that he wouldn't cheat on his best friend. He then in turn points out to her that if wanted to bring someone who truly loved her, she should have brought Peter in the first place. She realizes he's right and thanks him, but he returns it with a lewd comment and she smacks him, although she realizes he did it just for her feelings.

Lacx09 308 03a-0060
Meanwhile, despite Lois' orders to the contrary, the family orders pizza for dinner instead of eating the healthy food she set aside. But when they realize that the delivery driver has not yet returned from using their bathroom, they discover he has died on their toilet, causing Peter to be concerned about Lois finding out. When his phone rings and they discover that he's behind on his deliveries, they decide to take over his route so that they can't trace them back to their house. Placing Meg in the uniform with him she manages to freak her way through deliveries at the police station and others, before they end up at his last delivery, which is right back at their house.

With no other alternatives, the family prepares to shove the delivery driver into the sewer, but agree to say a little eulogy for him first. However, he's too fat to fit into the sewer and Lois arrives as they try, realizing that they ordered pizza against her wishes. She apologizes to Peter for taking Quagmire instead of him to her reunion, and he thankfully embraces her for leaving him out of it.